chat with a savant

sa·vant a person of profound or extensive learning; learned scholar.

EARLY Friday morning, my son and I had just dropped my daughter off to cheer practice. It was 6:30 AM. I am NOT a morning person, I am a night owl by profession and by a life time of training. I love David Letterman AND I love my Scotty Craig Ferguson, who is a hottie and on whom I have crushed since his Drew Carey days. Those who know my affinity for silver hair will not be surprised to know he is a beautiful, mature man with a grey/silver hair, AND he's very clever and witty. I LOVE clever and witty.....but I have digressed, as this blog is neither about my late night owl behavior NOR about hot older men.

So we are driving down the road, which due to the early hour, was clear. The sky was blue and clear and gorgeous. My brain was addled and tired, and NONE of those former attributes.

So it is at this moment that my beloved child says to me, while looking at a bus on the right of us, "Momma, why do buses have orange lights on them?" I was confused....orange lights? I scanned the bus very quickly. DO buses have orange lights? I paused and then stammered, "Ummm sweetie, I am not sure, I don't know why they have them. Do they HAVE orange lights?" He answered that they do, pointing in some general direction of the huge bus next to us. But he dropped it, and I was off the hook.

So I thought.

Then came a new question, lurking in the dark and waiting for me to get snagged in it's web. We were driving a bit faster than the bus, of course.....and as we passed the front window where the driver sat, Hunter asked his next question - a simple, easy question. "Hey momma, how come the bus steering wheel is so big? Is it because the wheels are so big?" Huhh! I haven't a clue. A flash of car sizes/wheel sizes and steering wheel sizes passed through my head. Do Monster Trucks have monster steering wheels? Do mini Coopers have a mini steering wheels? (And DAMN! I had just driven past 7-11 while trying to drive and think. No Dr Pepper for me this morning now. Too bad, it would have helped me come up with a snappy answer.)

"Oh Hunter," I said in my best i'm-sorry-your-mommy-is-such-a-dummy voice, "I'm not sure, honey. I'm sorry."

He said, "It's ok." letting me feel like I wasn't a total loser. For about 30 seconds.........

Then he said, "I'll ask daddy - HE knows more!"

duh duh duh DUHHHHHH!

And if you think THAT is funny - wait till you hear the Hooter's story in my next blog.